A wide range of church and local community speakers spoke engagingly about Rev Vai Ngahe’s book and his ministry, at the Avondale launch of Weaving, Networking and Taking Flight. They shared thoughtful insights, fun and celebration.
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“When Rev Vaitu’ulala Ngahe’s hands come together in prayer, I imagine big strong hands that comfort the lonely and the sick. I imagine hands that direct public service and selfless giving to others. I imagine hands that build furniture, till soil to build gardens and wield paint brushes to beautify public places.
The central theme of Weaving, Networking and Taking Flight is a contemporary perspective of Godly public service, the principle of applying a theological perspective to communities within Aotearoa New Zealand. It is an inspiring narrative of service that provides an insight into the progressive perspective of the Methodist Church of New Zealand.
Rev Vai puts at the heart of his journey an understanding that ministry is intrinsically linked to human need. The narrative of the book communicates his concern for social justice and human happiness, which goes hand and hand with ministry teachings and spiritual nourishment.
The book is a story of collective advocacy. Rev Vai is a sophisticated thinker. His days in Avondale and more recently in Manurewa reveal his appreciation of networking, building relationships, forming alliances, working collaboratively and communicating his message of service to others through multiple mediums.
The narrative is reflective. Rev Vai offers an insight into nine years of ministry and the importance of building healthy and hopeful communities. He reflects upon a holistic notion of health and hope, which requires an equal attention to the spiritual, physical, emotional and cultural well-being of the whole community. He ties this reflection back to Christ’s transformative work among the people and communities of his day.
The connection between the selfless giving of Christ and the transformative work of contemporary Christians has not changed through the generations. To this end Rev Vai provides an insight into how service can and should be offered to those around us. It is a lesson for all of us, not just those who minister and tend to our spiritual needs.
The book tells the story of three people who tagged buildings. Those people asked Rev Vai if they could join the church community, to which he replied that they were more than welcome to come. It is through this process of reconciliation that Rev Vai led a renaissance within the hearts of those people, as well as some initially ambivalent members of the wider church community.
Rev Vai asks the church to live out its theology of hospitality, a challenge that demands a leap of faith. He invites people with complex lives and challenging histories to become equal partners in the house of the Lord. The Manurewa Methodist Church is located on ‘the corner of hope.’ Through his work Rev Vai encourages people to throw open its doors to all; no one is declined the opportunity to enter under its roof.
Weaving, Networking and Taking Flight is a story of one man’s journey. It is a blueprint for service that provides an insight into ecumenical leadership in the context of communities in south and west Auckland.
From the days of the early missions to this land, from the early Wesleyan missionaries at Mangungu, at Kawhia, Manukau, Kaipara and Raglan, the Methodist Church of New Zealand has always placed great currency on the bi-cultural foundation of Aotearoa New Zealand. Methodist teachings acknowledge the foundational role of Te Tiriti o Waitangi, the importance of personal virtue, the value of sobriety, equality, and peace.
Weaving, Networking and Taking Flight contextualises these principles in the modern world. It is a story of inspired service.
People should read Weaving, Networking and Taking Flight. This book is a blueprint for those people who want to help build a stronger community, but who do not know where to start. The way to serve is outlined within its pages.”
Daniel Newman, June 2015
Lloyd Ashton asked Alister Hendery what should we be offering to Kiwis dealing with death.
Alister Hendery’s new book Earthed in Hope – Dying, Death and Funerals, a Pakeha Anglican Perspective was launched in Wellington last November. It is the fruit of a life that has specialised in death.
Over the course of 35 years in ministry, Alister has taken more than 1500 funerals – both as a priest and celebrant. He has also worked as a counsellor specialising in grief and loss.
Death is even a feature of Alister’s chosen sport.
A few years ago he took up powerlifting.
The demands of wrestling with a loaded Olympic bar saw him through the more intense periods of writing his book, he says.
He found too, that one of the sport’s three lifts became his favourite:
The deadlift.
“I’m often asked,” he says, “whether I find such a concentration on death depressing.
“On the contrary. It’s life-giving, it adds a sense of immediacy to life, teaching me to measure the present moment and to rely on the grace of God – believing, as I do, that the life I have and the life I will know after death is a gift from the One who created me and loves me.”
If appearances are anything to go by, that’s not mere talk, either.
Because Alister Hendery has an impish grin, a twinkle in his eye, and a ready wit.
Alister decided to write his book because he was appalled by the “acute lack of any serious writing about funeral ministry” in New Zealand.
He wanted to do something about that, to offer resources for funeral ministry – but also to kick-start conversations about death and bereavement.
Because death, he says is a subject we don’t talk about nearly enough.
It has been marginalised, even in the church.
“I go to Anglican funerals,” he says, “where the word ‘death’ is not used.
“The church has been seduced by a societal obsession with the beauty of youth.
“Of course youth matters. But not at the price of ignoring the elderly, and putting things like ministry to the dying and dead into a second tier.”
That lack of deliberate reflection about death and dying is all the more serious, he says, because the Kiwi Zeitgeist has changed.
“How we approach death, how we mark it, what we believe about it, what we do with our dead, has changed radically over the past four decades – and funeral ministry is caught up in this windstorm of cultural change.”
While the church has moved inexorably from the centre to the periphery of our culture, he says we haven’t seen the opportunity that lies at our feet.
“2016 marks the beginning of the demise of the baby boomer generation.
“The funeral industry is positioning itself for this development, but is the church readying itself with as much energy and commitment?”
We haven’t grasped, says Alister, that funeral ministry is “at the edge of our connection with society.
“It’s the place where the gospel and contemporary culture most keenly interact.
“Because it’s the area, as the Prayer Book says, that touches us most deeply.”
Alister began research for his book in 2010.
Within a year, Pike River and the first of the Christchurch quakes had happened.
“Suddenly, with Pike River, you had what one commentator described as the first expression of public grieving on the social networks.
“I was able to download literally thousands of postings, and a picture very quickly emerged.
“And I can tell you that neo-Platonism, the belief in an immortal soul, is alive and well. People are reverting to ancient images of the ferryman crossing the Styx.
“There is no concept of the Judaic-Christian belief in the resurrection of the body. It simply is not out there.”
In the wake of Pike River, Alister got tired of hearing the word closure being bandied around.
It comes, he says, from a 1970s model of grief. “The idea that if you achieve certain goals, people will be able to move on.”
“But human being just don’t work like that. Grief is a time of utter chaos. And we each grieve uniquely. It can’t be stylised in the form that the media present it.
“You never find closure to grief.
“It is always a part of you.
“We look for change. Radical change.
“But that’s not closure. I would go so far as to say that the whole psychological linear model is feeding people a lie.”
“I was watching a movie on day, and suddenly my eyes filled with tears. And it was a grief 30 years old.
“It was almost as though it had tapped me on the shoulder and said: ‘Just pay attention’.
“I didn’t need to go to a therapist. It said: ‘Just notice me. I’m still here in your life.’
Alister is not picking a fight with celebrants. After all, he’s been one himself.
“The church could learn from good celebrants,” he says, “about personalising and expressing the uniqueness of this death.
“What celebrants can’t do, is draw on the richness of the church’s tradition. And the strength of hope that we have, as we look beyond this death.
The celebrant funeral, he says “is often almost entirely retrospective.
“It’s for the living. But the church says” ‘No. It’s not just for the living. It’s for the dead, too.’
We acknowledge the retrospective – but we say there is a prospective dimension. There is a hope.
“That is still the gift the church has. But what the church needs to do, is to learn to speak the language of the people around it.”
Alister Hendery was ordained in 1980.
He’s now 61.
“Because my life on earth is now more memory than future,” he writes, “I am increasingly mindful of my own mortality.”
Having officiated a hundreds of funerals, he now practises a discipline:
“As I leave a funeral, I take a moment to be still, and in that stillness I say to myself:
“One day this will be me.
“One day, I shall not walk away from this place.
“Should I forget this, the liturgies of the church remind me of my mortality and the need to prepare for death – my death.”
And the last words of his book are a quote form what he considers to be an “utterly brilliant resource” – the New Zealand Prayer Book:
There is nothing in death or life,
in the world as it is,
or the world as it shall be,
nothing in all creation,
that can separate us from the love of God
in Jesus Christ our Lord.
(Romans 8:38-39)
Here is what two readers have said about Rosalie’s enthralling new novel:
“Molly’s story will take you through experiences spiritual and sexual seldom talked about openly, but so often struggled with in silence. The skilful and insightful choice of words – both descriptive and sometimes disturbing – creates images and recalls memories for people of all ages. This book is engaging, informative, entertaining and challenging.” Rev Loyal Gibson
“Thank you Rosalie for your passion for social justice. This book challenges us to think about complex issues that unfortunately are still very real today. It is thought-provoking and an ideal book for group discussion and dialogue. Each chapter brings to life questions and a reality we sometimes would rather avoid for fear of the unknown. We all have a responsibility to care and make a stand for life.”
Mataiva D. Robertson: Social Issues Convenor for Sinoti Samoa, Methodist Church of New Zealand
The following review by Rev John Meredith appears in the June 2015 issue of Touchstone – the Methodist Church’s monthly newspaper.
“Alister G. Hendery,
Earthed in Hope.
Dying, Death and Funerals. A Pakeha Anglican Perspective.
Wellington: Philip Garside, 2014, 300 pages.
Hendery remarks that over the past four decades funeral practices in New Zealand have undergone sweeping changes. Celebrants who are not clergy conduct well over half Pakeha funerals and offer a highly personalised, life-centred alternative to churches. Although the church is no longer the chief provider of funeral ceremonies, Christian faith has a realistic approach to death and grief that is grounded in undying hope in God. Writing from an Pakeha Anglican perspective, Hendery addresses significant issues of Christian faith and practice and touches on matters relevant to all who exercise funeral ministry.
A funeral marks the ending of a human life and, as Hendery points out, people today have a wide choice in style and content of a funeral service. When a minister of the church is requested to officiate it cannot be taken for granted that the community for this funeral either understands or accepts the Christian story. Listening is a key part of the minister’s preparation. It is also important for a minister to accept that profound feelings of the loss of a physical presence cannot be assuaged by religious formulae.
At several places in the book the author stresses that whatever form the funeral takes, the most effective feature will be the embodiment of compassion by the minister. While those attending the funeral may forget what was said they will probably remember the attitude of the minister.
While a minister of the church is a spokesperson for the gospel, Hendery stresses this does not mean imposing on people. Ministers must be flexible and willing to offer guidance rather than ruling on matters such as choice of music and form of tribute.
Hendery expresses concern about the way euphemistic language may diminish the reality of someone’s death. Too often a person passes away to become the deceased. Instead, the author prefers unambiguous language. His practice of referring to someone who has died as “the dead person” indicates both respect for the person and an acceptance of reality.
The idea of closure, as it is popularly termed, is addressed thoughtfully. Writing of the pastoral care of people who are grieving, Hendery suggests that while, over time, those who have been bereaved may become reconciled to their loss, this does not mean that closure, is an appropriate end to the experience of grief. Those who are left continue to relate to those who have died through memory and abiding influence.
For those concerned with funeral ministry there is much in this book that will repay careful reflection: how God and Christian hope are presented, the avoidance of euphemisms and idealistic eulogies, ritual at and after the funeral, funerals following suicide, funerals of children and children at funerals. Hendery states: We need to be able to look death in the face and be willing to wrestle with the theological, spiritual and emotional demands that this takes. Earthed in Hope offers significant help for those who are serious about doing this.”
The In-Between Land: Psalms, Poems and Haiku will be released in print and as an eBook on 15 June 2015.
The book will be launched at 2.30pm on Saturday, 13 June 2015 at Wainoni Methodist Church, Avonside Drive, (between Kerrs Road & Wainoni Road.)
Here are sample haiku that appear in the book.
autumn leaves party
loudly for days on the trees,
then loiter on streets
first snow of winter
white magic-dust turning hills
into polar bears
the gardener plants
evenly spaced lettuces
self-sown spud subverts
light loiters around
long into the evening
taunting the darkness
The In-Between Land: Psalms, Poems and Haiku will be released in print and as an eBook on 15 June 2015.
The book will be launched at 2.30pm on Saturday, 13 June 2015 at Wainoni Methodist Church, Avonside Drive, (between Kerrs Road & Wainoni Road.)
Here is a sample of the poems that appear in the book.
Neighbourhood all-year BBQ
fire up the barbecue
gather up again
create a loving island
in this sea of suffering
it’s always simple fare
with sausages and bread
if you’re lucky there are onions
but everyone gets fed
come sun, or cloud or snow
we keep the circle warm
we started in the shingle
now we’re on the lawn
we’re never really sure
who will turn up on the day
the group that forms each Thursday
always seems to change
there’s always lots of talking
laced with a laugh or two
it colours up our week
when feeling grey or blue
sometimes a bellbird sings
from the bottle-brush tree
and dogs like to join the party
hoping for an extra feed
the chef once made a toast
to all our absent friends
Dave and Noel have passed away
but mem’ry never ends
for the Unseen Presence
we raised our glasses too
the Spirit at the heart
calling us on to the new
— New Brighton, 2013
The In-Between Land: Psalms, Poems and Haiku will be released in print and as an eBook on 15 June 2015.
Here is a sample of the poems that appear in the book.
They’re taking my city away
like some failed
experiment
they’re taking my city away
house by house
block by block
whole suburbs
disappearing
to hidden forest
blackhole
dirty trucks
on shattered streets
moving much more than bricks and wood,
moving mem’ries
moving hopes
moving all
the little things
that take a lifetime
to grow
sadness haunts
the empty land
where children once played,
couples made love
argued and cried
neighbours chatted
over fences
about grandchildren
and things
nor’wester
sucking up dust
they’re taking my city away
ground going too
filling our hair
getting in eyes
gritting mouths
with the bitter grain
of what was
they’re taking
my city away
now the sacred task of building
a new one starts –
may we all be the builders
may we build with
wise heads
raise up with
love in our hearts.
— East Christchurch, 2013